I don't want you to be a gentleman.

I listen to pop music in the car, I'm not sure why because the lyrics always drive me bonkers, but I guess it's fun to sing along to and upbeat background music.  I always end up thinking way too much about the messages sent in song lyrics and lately the one song that's been driving me bonkers is Shawn Mendes' current song:

I won't lie to you
I know he's just not right for you
And you can tell me if I'm off
But I see it on your face
When you say that he's the one that you want
And you're spending all your time
In this wrong situation
And anytime you want it to stop
I know I can treat you better than he can
And any girl like you deserves a gentleman
Tell me why are we wasting time
On all your wasted crying
When you should be with me instead
I know I can treat you better
Better than he can

First off, as a woman, KTHXBYE for your opinion on my relationship and your assertion that you'd be better for me.  Just what I need, another man telling me how I should live my life.  The song should be re-titled, "I Know I Can Mansplain You Better."

Cynicism aside the word "gentleman" stands out to me.  And it's a word that I kind of want to be done with.  It's veiled sexism at its finest.  Because I don't want men to be gentlemen to me, I want them to be decent humans who treat other humans who happen to be women like they treat male humans.  They respect women the way they respect men.  They honor women the way the honor men.  They pay women the amount they pay men.  They fight for women to have the same privileges and rights as men because they are fellow humans who deserve that.  

You can treat her better?  Why don't you fight for her rights?  Speak up when your shitty friends are slut shaming girls.  Be an advocate for equal pay.  Stop saying things like, "she's just being hormonal," and saying that things done weakly/poorly are done, "like a girl."  I don't want your condescending gentleman shtick.  I don't want you to bring me flowers and open a door for me.  Get in the trenches and be a real advocate for women.  Maybe she is dating a lame-o, but being a gentleman isn't what she needs.  She needs a feminist.

Maternity Style // Week 31

Mmm, lazy Sundays are so nice.  We went out to brunch this morning with family, then went shopping around town for some warm clothes, since winter is fast approaching!  Our lake is totally frozen now and the nights are falling well below freezing, which means snow should be here shortly!  

Dress (similar) : Thrifted | Boots : c/o Cat Footwear | Hat : c/o Moorea Seal
Necklace : Free People

Your Brave

Last night I was over at my parents' and they have been performing an archeological dig of their home office this past week, unearthing thousands of power cords to devices that probably don't exist any more, tons of documents that are useful only for shredding and recycling, and old laptops which function mostly as external hard drives for photo storage.  Anyway, they'd pulled out my mom's old laptop from circa '06-'08 and it's screen saver was a slideshow of old photos taken during those years.  One of the big things that happened was our 2007 family cross-country RV trip and hidden amongst the photos of us standing in front of national monuments and at national parks, there's a photo of a 70's Winnebago RV.  It's not a Brave, but it's the same generation as my Braves, and I remembered how that trip galvanized my love for them, and my desire to live mobile.  I went back to college that fall and started making art about and of Winnebagos, and a year after graduation, got my first Brave.  

As far as talismans go, I don't recommend something that takes an oversized garage to house, but we all have those talismans that we hold dear that represent more than just the object itself.  While what the Brave represents for me has always been in my heart, that summer of 2007, being on the road with fellow RV residents, and finding my love for 70's Winnebagos galvanized that meaning into something more tangible and real.  My Brave represents freedom, living life on my terms, living sustainably, feeling wild and untamed, exploration, creativity, the beauty of necessity, being in nature, the sacred sanctuary of the road, meeting new adventurous humans, and so much more.  The Brave encapsulates so many of the things I most value in life.  Like a locket worn daily, I keep the image of her close to my heart, reminding me of those things.

My talisman is a ridiculously large vehicle, what is yours?  What is the image or object that always hones in on what you value, what you desire for your life, what makes your creativity come alive?  

Maternity Style // Week 30

Starting to feel kind of like a house, which makes sense, because there is an ever-enlarging human residing inside me.  Two more months of this, woof!  Last night we built my crib, so the baby's room is slowly, very slowly, coming together!  I've been enjoying my lazy, slow mornings snuggling in bed with Dusty, knowing the my days of full nights of sleep are numbered.  

The past couple weeks I've been so focused on shooting weddings and sessions that I've dropped the ball on organizing and decorating the apartment.  It's hard finding new places for everything to go, and I desperately want to paint all the walls and make things feel fresh, but stuff takes time.  I forget that in our old house I'd left our living room half painted for about 6 months, and that it took all of the 3+ years we lived there to get every room looking the way I wanted.  I can be so impatient at times, I think of a project and want to do it immediately.  But that's not the way life works always. So I'm learning to be more patient and take projects as I can.

Top : Thrifted (Forever 21) | Jeans : Flying Monkey | Boots : Kensie Girl

Maternity Style // Week 29

Two months to go and I'm starting to feel very pregnant.  It's still so bizarre to me that I even am pregnant.  Sometimes I'll just stand in the mirror and be like, is this real life?  Still haven't started working on the nursery.  Still haven't come even close to picking a name.  Have bought some clothes, and my baby shower is on Saturday, so this baby thing is sinking in at least a little!  A stranger asked me when I was due yesterday, so I guess I'm at the point now where I look actually pregnant, not just ambiguously rotund.  Now excuse me while I go take a weeklong nap because I'm an insane person and scheduled a 15 hour travel day with 3 flights at 7 months pregnant...

Top : Thrifted (Free People) | Leggings : Motherhood Maternity | Boots : Vogue Footwear
Hat : c/o Moorea Seal | Necklace : Free People | Cardigan : c/o Modcloth